Notes from the Regional Gathering

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Regional gathering attendees. Photo by Linda Bergh

On Saturday, October 6, 2018, the MTN Twin Cities hosted our third regional gathering. The event brought together people from throughout Minnesota and Wisconsin to discuss what’s going on in our communities around conscious dying, family-directed after-death care, and green burial. The meeting was held at the home of Linda Bergh. Nineteen people attended.

In the morning, each group checked into to tell us all about what they’ve been up to. Here are some general notes from those reports, although no notes can ever capture the true richness of experience represented in that room.

Southeast Minnesota Threshold Network (Rochester area; Deah reporting)

  • Feeling of dwindling. Would like thoughts on how to grow the network and do work in the community.
  • Series of meetings to get to know each other by talking about what each person wants for their own death.
  • Decorated a “coffin” and had each person lie in it. Others talked about what they would miss about the “dead” person
  • Trainings in body-washing and supporting grieving families
  • Sunday, November 4: death open mic in Rochester
  • Elephant in the Room is a local collaboration of hospice, library, medical society, SE MTN, & many others who have worked together for several years. They’re planning a month of death-related events in November called Community Reflections of Living & Dying. Kickoff on Thursday, November 1.
  • Question: how can groups support each other?
  • Facebook: SE Minnesota Threshold Network, Elephant In the Room Network – end of life planning

 

Threshold Care Circle (Viroqua, WI; Liz reporting)

  • Groups size has ebbed and flowed. In a “small” phase right now.
  • No green cemetery in the area; in Vernon county, people can bury on their own land.
  • People are now contacting them for help with both personal and policy questions. Helping get laws changed/helping people understand the law in their area
  • Group has diversified, which has allowed them to offer different kinds of workshops
  • It may seem like not much is happening, but you never know what the impact has been and how far the ripples have gone out
  • Question: when we have materials, how do we most effectively get them where they need to be?
  • Facebook: Threshold Care Circle

 

Tabooyah (Menomonie, WI; Terri reporting)

  • Small core group
  • See themselves as a resource group
  • Name comes from “taboo” + “booyah” (how cool is that?)
  • Rochelle Martin TED Talk, “Let’s Talk About Death
  • Had a table at local farmer’s market to Tell your Story on end of life
  • Investigated and learned that  residents of their county have a choice to be buried on homestead property. Easements may be required if the land is subsequently sold.
  • A lot of personal growth and commitment to the work
  • This work happens all the time. People die whenever they do; they don’t wait for a convenient time
  • Want to do more work in their community. Want to get ideas and energy around what they’re doing.
  • Question: how can groups offer each other energy and support?
  • Email address: tabooyahwi@gmail.com

 

Duluth, MN (Dana reporting)

  • Dana is new to this and very excited.

 

Mankato, MN (Mary Ann reporting)

  • Deva Nation. Nonprofit linked to an international movement of compassionate communities. A public health movement.
  • US is the only country with a for-profit healthcare system, which is why we don’t have any compassionate communities for end-of-life.
  • Public Health Palliative Care International
  • Want to create a compassionate town council. Each sector comes forward with policies to create a town charter that will be reviewed each year.
  • One Bright Star: nonprofit for families who have had a child die.
  • The vision: when anyone in the community is dying, caring, or grieving, we will all know what to do.
  • Question: how do we get Mary Ann some more people?!?
  • Birth, Breath, and Death, Amy Wright Glenn

 

 

Mind-Body Solutions (Minnetonka; Catherine reporting)

 

MTN Twin Cities (Linda, Karen, and others reporting)

  • Stay With Me Awhile, Mary Johnson and Barbara Means Frasier. New thirty-minute version on December 11 at Spirit of St. Stephen’s Catholic Community
  • Opening up the leadership team, restructuring the leadership team, reconsidering the mission
  • Question: how does leadership move into this new time with authenticity? How to do organization differently?
  • Question: how to bring younger people into this conversation?
  • Question: how to balance people who do this as a side passion with people who are doing it as a job and need to make money from it?
  • Started a mentoring framework: one person who’s been doing this for a while partners with one new person for each meeting

 

General Thoughts

After lunch, attendees held a planning discussion regarding the National Home Funeral Alliance 2019 national conference, which will be held in Chaska, Minnesota from October 4-6, 2019. Anyone who’s interested in helping plan and/or volunteer during this event is asked to contact Mary Ann Boe at maryann @ devanation . com

We are grateful to everyone who made the trek to this gathering, and to Linda for hosting. Let’s keep the ideas and enthusiasm flowing between us.

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Regional gathering attendees. Photo by Ellen Hufschmidt
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November Meeting: The Art of Natural Death Care

MN Threshold Network invites you to attend:

THE ART OF NATURAL DEATH CARE: a movie, discussion, and demonstration

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Cover Image from Katelyn LaGrega’s “The Art of Natural Death Care”

The movie is Katelyn LaGrega’s documentary about loving, heart-felt, sacred, and compelling stories of how we can care for our own loved ones after death.

LEARN ABOUT NATURAL DEATH CARE:

•Options that exist no matter where someone dies for grief vigils and funerals
•Facts about legality and lowered costs
•Ways that open the heart when it hurts the most
•Demo on blessing or washing a loved one’s body

DATE: Wednesday, Nov. 7th  (please VOTE on Tuesday the 6th!)
TIME: 7-8:30pm
LOCATION: Nokomis Square Senior Coop
5015 35th Ave. So., Minneapolis, MN 55417
Community Room (parking and entrances in front and back of building).
FREE OF CHARGE. Treats welcome. Tea will be available. Donations of the heart accepted.

***Invite your own family members, such as adult children and grandchildren, and close friends (in other words, your “peeps”). It’s a great opportunity to have a the discussion that isn’t easy, but you may secretly want to have. Face the elephant in the room with support from this program.***

September Book Sharing

Books about death: they're made of dead trees!

The annual MTN book sharing will be at 7:00 PM on Wednesday, September 12 (since our usual 2nd Tuesday is Rosh Hashanah this year). It will be at the home of Anne Murphy, 287 Mt. Curve Blvd, St. Paul.

Be thinking about your favorite death and dying book to share and/or swap. Go home with a reading list of great books for the rest of the year.

June Forum: Dying to Know: conversations about the end of life

The Minnesota Threshold Network invites you to our annual June Forum

Dying to Know: Conversations about Choices at the End-of-Life

open to friends, families, groups of all ages to explore together the choices around end-of-life
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The Concept:

Participate in lively conversations about death and after death arrangements for yourself and/or loved ones.

Questions such as “What would your ideal death look like?” “Who would be there?” “How would I like to be honored after I die” and many more… Have the conversation you have wanted to have around death and dying

St. Clements Episcopal Church, Parish Hall

901 Portland Avenue

Saint Paul, MN 55104

Tuesday, June 5th

7-8:30pm

Free and open to all. Donation of the heart are welcomed

Interested? RSVP to Ellen Hufschmidt at ritesofchange@gmail.com

Twin Cities May Event: Death Over Dinner

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What is Death Over Dinner? It is a chance to gather in a familiar setting to talk with welcoming people about death, a discussion that most people try to avoid.

Death Over Dinner is an opportunity to have that difficult yet crucial end-of-life conversation we often tiptoe around. While sharing a meal together, groups will have a chance to ponder and discuss questions such as, “What was your first experience of death like?” or, “If you had a choice, where would you die?”

Food and beverage will be provided.

Please join us for an enlightening discussion!

Tuesday, May 1, 2018
6:00-8:00 PM
Mount Olivet Lutheran Church of Plymouth
(Fireside Room)
12235 Old Rockford Road
Plymouth, MN 55411

April Twin Cities Event: Storysharing Night

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Wednesday, April 11, 2018, 7:30-9:30 PM
at
Kieran’s Irish Pub – Poet’s Room (follow link for map)
85 6th St N, Minneapolis, MN 55403
Hear and share stories of how our experiences with home vigils, family-directed death care, and green disposition have touched our lives. The April MTN Twin Cities event is a storytelling night cohosted by Word Sprout!

A few MTN members will come with prepared stories. An open mic time will follow. You’re invited to bring your five-minute story of your experiences as a death doula, vigil-sitter, green-burier, or other ways death has touched your life.

 

Twin Cities Networking Event

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MTN Twin Cities will host a Deathwork/Network night in January. We call out to death doulas, funeral celebrants, coffin-makers, and anyone else who is working, as either a career or a passion, in the fields of conscious dying, family-directed death care, and green disposition, to meet others and share resources and knowledge.
 
We are stronger together.
Meeting details:
Tuesday, January 16, 2018, 7-9 pm
at the home of Marianne Dietzel
All MTN meetings are free and open to the public. Donations of the heart accepted.